BIOMarsheila (Marcy) Rockwell is a thirtysomething author, engineer, Navy (Seabee) wife and mother of three wonderful sons. She is a Rhysling-nominated poet and a member of the SFWA, IAMTW, and SFPA. She also serves as a poetry editor for Mindflights. Her first novel, Legacy of Wolves, was published by Wizards of the Coast in June 2007 and she is currently under contract to write two additional novels for them.
December 2009
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12/2/09 11:59 am
Update
November 2009 Tally
Submissions: 3
Rejections: 3
Sales: 0
Total submissions for 2009: 40
Total rejections: 31
Total sales: 7
Ave. submissions/month for 2009: 4
Percent sales for 2009: 18%
No sales again this month, alas.
Everything Else
So we have not yet heard back from the surgeon RE: Max's MRI. However, we DID hear from the oncologist, who had reviewed the MRI report and had GREAT news!
The tumor has continued to shrink, and is now only 18 cubic centimeters, a total reduction in size to date of almost 90%!!!!!! Praise God!!!! And what's left of the tumor shows large areas of calcification, which I think means those areas are inactive now (i.e., not cancerous), but I'm trying to get some clarification on that. Regardless, while we knew the tumor continuing to shrink was a possibility, it's one none of us (including Max's oncologist) really thought would happen. This is your prayers at work!!!!! Thank you all so much -- they really DO make a difference! Imagine if the tumor continued to shrink until there was nothing left! What an awesome Christmas gift that would be!
11/30/09 11:21 am
Writing
*Rejection, Clockwork Phoenix 3, 11/30 (RT: 7 weeks)
Everything Else
We leave in a few minutes to go have Max's MRI done. Please pray that it shows us conclusively whether the tumor has grown into the IVC or not, so that we can make an informed decision about surgery.
Also, in a Marcyville college football shocker, it looks like Nebraska will almost certainly being playing USC in the Holiday Bowl (barring a win over Texas, which, let's face it, is pretty darned unlikely). Guess who'll be spending New Year's in CA as a result? Heh.
11/25/09 11:03 pm
Writing
*Submission, Heroic Fantasy Quarterly, 11/22
Everything Else
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! We are having a quiet family dinner at home (heat and eat turkey dinner from Target -- you'd be surprised how good it is), followed by a weekend of Big 12 football and the big USC-UCLA game.
This is of course the time of year when folks stop to reflect on the blessings in their lives, and we're no different here. This year when we're going around the table counting our blessings, these are a few of the things I'll be mentioning:
*I'm thankful for my family, especially the newest addition, and for the fact that he is such a fighter;
*I'm thankful for the chance to get paid to do something I love (writing -- get your minds out of the gutter!), and for the chance to work with and be friends with some extremely talented, smart and fun people; and
*I'm thankful for you, my reader(s), without whom this blog would be pretty pointless.
Enjoy your turkey, and Go Big Red!
11/22/09 11:18 am
Writing
So. Arkham Tales has apparently published its last issue. Which really bites because, aside from the fact it means we've lost yet another small press venue for genre work, the editor had accepted a story of mine back in March and now it won't be published (and I, alas, will not be paid). And of course the few markets this story might have worked for have closed in the interim, because that's just the way it works in Marcyville. Sigh.
Everything Else
A brief Max update. What's left of the tumor appears to still be wrapped around the inferior vena cava (IVC), and may, in fact, have grown into the blood vessel -- they simply can't tell from the scans. So we've scheduled an MRI for the 30th, which will hopefully give us more information. If it doesn't, or if it confirms that the tumor is inside the IVC, then we may have to reconsider surgery, as it would then require removal and reconstruction of the IVC, at a spot very close to where the blood vessels that lead to the kidneys attach. In other words, the surgery then becomes very, VERY risky. So we are sort of at an impasse here, until we get the results of the MRI back, at which point we will have to make some very difficult decisions.
In the meantime, both hubby and Max have come down with the swine flu. Hubby started Tamiflu back on Wednesday and is still hacking and feverish. Max's cough started Wednesday and he was running a fever on Thursday, so we started him on Tamiflu then, and he's already better. Go figure. YB is also on Tamiflu, not because he has the flu, but because he has his breathing-treatment-and-steroid respiratory crap he gets every year, and that puts him at risk for serious complications if he DOES get the flu. So far, EB and I are still healthy; hopefully it will stay that way.
On top of all that, the ILs were in town for a little over a week, including my SIL the nun, who stayed at our house. Wacky adventures ensued. Okay, not really, but she did get to finally meet her godson, which was nice.
Oh, and one other small thing. Nebraska won the Big 12 North! Woohoo! (Yes, I'm fully aware of the fact that the Big 12 North sucks this year, but I will take my victories where I can get them, thank you very much.)
11/11/09 08:10 am
Writing
*Submission, Flashing Swords, 11/9
*Submission, Mythic Delirium, 11/10
No, I didn't submit to the guest-edited issue -- in my eyes, it's hard enough to figure out exactly what an editor wants for their own magazine without trying to fathom what he or she might think ANOTHER editor wants for THEIR magazine. That way lies madness. Or, you know, at least a migraine. Heh.
Everything Else
First, thanks to everyone for sharing in our joy over Max's scans! We are still over the moon!
Okay, now on to other things....
A very interesting and insightful post by John C. Wright about the whole Mammoth Book of Mind-Blowing SF debacle (thanks to JM for the link). I happen to agree with pretty much everything the esteemed Mr. Wright has written here and, for the record, I am neither male nor (technically) white.
And his post reminds me of something similar that I've been wanting to address for some time -- namely, the idea that words written on a message board can somehow constitute "sexual violence." In my mind, this is sheer lunacy. Violence is a guy with a knife at your throat, or everyone's favorite uncle threatening to kill Mommy and Daddy and Spot if you tell. It is NOT someone flaming you on a message board, even if that someone uses words that some particularly fragile egos might perceive as threatening. If there is no reasonable expectation that that "threat" would be followed with actual, physical harm, then it doesn't even qualify as "violence," let alone violence of the sexual variety.
You can choose not to read those offending messages, you can put that person on ignore, you can quit that particular message board or group, you can turn your computer off and walk away. Those are NOT options with ACTUAL sexual violence.
You cannot equate the one situation with the other. Attempting to do so demeans the experiences of people who have actually suffered through REAL sexual violence (you know, the kind you CAN'T walk away from?) and is a slap in the face to those men and women who have fought so hard to survive the awful things that happened to them. And, frankly, that's FAR more unconscionable than whatever might have been posted on some silly writer's board.
(Yes, I imagine there are some sites out there that depict ACTUAL sexual violence in word and image, and I could see how THAT might make some people feel threatened, but that's NOT the situation I'm referring to here and it really doesn't compare.)
And that's all I have to say about that.
(Oh, and don't forget to thank a vet today! Dinner is always a nice expression of gratitude. Heh.)
11/7/09 08:44 am
Writing
We interrupt this section of the blog posting for the following Very Important Announcement:
Everything Else
PRAISE GOD!!!!!!! Max's scans show that the tumor has been reduced in size by almost 80%!!!!! No more chemo!!!!!!! Thank you all so much for your prayers for my little boy -- I KNOW they made (and continue to make) all the difference!!!!!
We have a follow-up meeting with the oncologist next week after he reviews Max's scans with the surgeons at PCH. We are praying that the tumor is small enough now that they will be able to remove it entirely here at our home hospital. If they still don't feel comfortable doing so, we will probably look into having the surgery done in NY by a world-famous surgeon who does nothing but remove neuroblastoma tumors that other doctors are afraid to touch.
Please do keep Max in your prayers -- even if the tumor is removed completely, the 11q LOH marker that he has is associated with a high rate of relapse. So we will likely never be completely out of the woods, but we can live quite happily on the edge of the meadow!
So please say a prayer of thanks, do the happy dance, grab a beer (well, later in the day, heh) -- whatever it is you do to celebrate good news, and celebrate with us! We are just about the happiest folks on the planet today!!!!!!!! WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!!
11/5/09 07:52 pm
Writing
*Rejection, Heroic Fantasy Quarterly, 11/5 (RT: 2 months)
Everything Else
Survived the scans, but Max did wind up running a fever in the wee hours that sent us scurrying for the ER. They pumped him full of antibiotics and (thankfully) cut us loose, since his fever had subsided by the time we got there (Isn't that always what happens? Kids and cars, heh.) and he wasn't acting sick at all. We did get his blood counts while we were there, and his hemoglobin had dropped even further, so Max will definitely be getting a transfusion tomorrow. But otherwise he seems happy and healthy, so we're grateful for that. Hopefully we'll have even more to be grateful for tomorrow.
Please also remember all the victims of the Ft. Hood massacre in your thoughts/prayers tonight -- all of those who are still waiting to hear if their family and friends are safe and well (I know several), and all those who already know that they're not.
11/3/09 08:09 pm
Writing
*Rejection, Strange Horizons, 11/3 (RT: 2 1/2 weeks)
A sad day in the Realms. Best wishes to Paul as he moves on with his career; I'm sure he'll be successful no matter what universe he's writing in!
Everything Else
One long day down, one to go. They did Max's counts when we went to the clinic to get his port accessed and his hemoglobin was actually low enough that they'd normally have given him a transfusion, but our schedule was just too tight. If it's still low on Friday, he'll get one after our consult with the oncologist.
The echo went well. The VSD is holding steady at about 3 mm, with no aortic involvement, so that's good news. And there doesn't seem to be any chemo-related heart damage, so that's good. Also, the cardiologist said it doesn't look like there's any restriction to flow in either the aorta or the vena cava, so hopefully that means the tumor is no longer encasing them, which would be wonderful news, but of course we won't know for sure until they do the CT/MIBG scans tomorrow. So, if your knees are up to it and you have a few moments to spare, prayers to that effect would be most appreciated.
11/1/09 05:10 pm
Update
October 2009 Tally
Submissions: 3
Rejections: 2
Sales: 1
Total submissions for 2009: 37
Total rejections: 28
Total sales: 7
Ave. submissions/month for 2009: 4
Percent sales for 2009: 19%
Didn't count the "maybe" sale, since I'm still waffling on that one. Which is pretty telling in and of itself, I know, but let me play in the waters of de Nile a little longer, okay?
Everything Else
Scans this week. Just typing that makes me want to vomit. Echo on Tuesday and CT/MIBG scans and hearing test Wednesday, then we meet with the oncologist Friday to find out where we're at. We may know something Tuesday, though, as our cardiologist is on call at the hospital, so will be reading the echo as soon as it's done, and we'll be meeting with him afterward. He may be able to tell us if the tumor is still encasing the aorta/vena cava, which will give us some idea of whether the chemo's been effective or not.
Ugh. Not thinking about it. Moving on....
EB and YB got their H1N1 shots Saturday -- the pediatrician called us the minute they got their doses in, so we got priority. No side effects that we've noticed -- not even pain at the injection site, which they both did have with the seasonal shot.
In other Marcyville news, the Trojans knocked themselves out of the Rose Bowl this weekend, so that was a bummer. Of course, the Huskers shot themselves in both feet a couple of weeks back, and will be lucky to even get a bowl invite this year. They just need to dump their quarterback, and, I don't know...maybe get one who knows how to run the option????? You know, what Nebraska used to be famous for? Back when they actually had winning seasons? Anyone else remember that? No?
Yeah, okay, I guess I am old. Heh.
10/29/09 04:03 pm
Writing
*SALE! Wondrous Web Worlds Vol. 9, 10/28
*Rejection, New Myths, 10/28 (RT: 2 months)
The sale is a reprint of my poem, "Seven Sisters," which was published in The Martian Wave back in January of 2008, and was voted best poem for that month. Gotta love those sales you're not even trying for, heh.
Also got my first royalty statement from Popcorn Press for the Lilith Unbound antho. I wish all royalty statements were so easy to read (and had checks attached)!
Everything Else
Off to get EB and YB their flu shots in a few minutes (seasonal, not H1N1, and shot, not nasal, since Max can't be around anyone who's had the live vaccine). My pediatrician's office is actually officially "out" of shots (I heard some moms complaining about it on the playground today while I waited for YB to get out of school), but they always have some in reserve for "high risk" patients. The boys aren't high risk, of course, but Max is, so they qualify. One of the perks of having a kid with cancer, I guess.
(NOTE: The above was tongue-in-cheek, for any of you who may be newcomers to the blog. Long-time readers are no doubt familiar with my somewhat warped sense of humor and need no such disclaimer.)
10/26/09 12:20 pm
Writing
The debut issue of Paper Crow is now available, featuring my poem, "Of Amaranth and Honey." The TOC lists some of the best speculative poets in the business, and I'm happy to be included among them. So, if you love fantasy, science fiction and horror, and value beautiful language, buy yourself a copy. It costs about the same as that grande latte I see you sipping over your laptop keyboard, and it will last a heckuva lot longer.
Everything Else
Max had to have a platelet transfusion at his last clinic visit (Friday). A transfusion of any sort adds a good two to three hours to a normal clinic visit, so that meant Friday was pretty much shot. His ANC was also pretty low -- 496 -- so we've been in quarantine mode for the weekend. We have another clinic visit tomorrow, where hopefully they'll tell us his counts have rebounded and we can stop the G-SCF shots. Then we should be free for a whole week before we have to go back in for the dreaded scans.
We also celebrated EB's 15th birthday this weekend (eep!). No party since a) Max was severely neutropenic and b) EB's grades sucked like a Hoover this quarter, but we did do curbside takeout and have a nice dinner at home with the ILs.
And, lest you think he's been forgotten, YB had perfect attendance his first quarter! This amazing feat earned him not one, but two free kids meals, a couple of certificates, a pencil and a cheesy but colorful keychain. Wanna guess which one of those things he liked the most? Yup, the keychain. Really, WHY do we spend thousands of dollars on toys for our kids when they demonstrate time and again that they'd be just as happy with cardboard boxes, sticks and pretty rocks? I suspect parental guilt has a lot to do with it -- or maybe we just need a good excuse to buy video games? Heh.
10/20/09 08:58 am
Writing
Everyone go wish the newest Forgotten Realms author a very Happy Birthday, filled with thick tomes of arcana and dark, juicy pomegranates!
Everything Else
This round of chemo has been pretty rough on Max. He threw up several times in the clinic, then Friday was the worst in terms of side effects that he's ever experienced. He threw up at least ten times, and the last three or four was nothing but stomach acid. He was SO sick and listless, nothing like his normal happy self at all, it was just heartbreaking.
He perked up a little Saturday -- still threw up a few times, but was able to keep breastmilk down. Then Saturday evening the diarrhea started, and continued through yesterday, huge liquidy messes. We (I) probably changed his clothes four times a day every day this weekend. But at least he's more himself, laughing and playing.
We go back to the clinic in about an hour for blood counts, which we will do twice a week until they start to recover. Then we go back Nov. 3 & 4 for scans to see how the tumor has responded. If there's a good enough response, hopefully they can remove what's left surgically. If there's been a good response, but not enough to be able to remove the tumor (remember, it's wrapped around both the aorta and the vena cava), then we'll just observe it closely, but no more chemo. And, of course, if the response hasn't been good, then we do another 4 to 6 rounds of even stronger chemo. Hopefully (PLEASE, God!) it will be the first or second case, and not the third.
10/15/09 07:00 pm
Writing
*Submission, Strange Horizons, 10/15
And a maybe-sale. Maybe, because after reading the contract, I'm not sure I like the terms. Granted, it's a trunk story, inasmuch as I ever trunk anything (which I don't, really -- I just put the story or poem away until a new market opens up that might be appropriate -- one always does). But I like the story and I can't help wondering if I should pass on this offer and wait for something with terms I find a little more agreeable. Hmmm...
Everything Else
Finished up the 4th round of chemo today, with a surprise blood transfusion tacked on for fun (his hemoglobin was 9.1 on Tuesday, so they did counts again today and it'd dropped down to 7.9). We do scans the first week of November to find out if the chemo's done its job or not.
Please, please, PLEASE God let this be the last chemo Max ever needs!
10/7/09 04:48 pm
Writing
*Submission, Clockwork Phoenix 3, 10/7
*Rejection, IGMS, 10/7 (RT: 3 months)
Everything Else
As the parent of a child with cancer, this story INFURIATES me. Shame on you, Victoria's Secret. You've lost my business, forever.
(Stolen from my good friend Jaime who does in fact value and understand poetry, and also civility.)
10/6/09 07:22 am
Writing
So, a question for my fellow authors/poets. But, first, some background.
In the course of my 15-year+ writing career, my work has been published in places ranging the gamut from one-person labors of love to international best-selling publishing houses, and everything in between. In that time, I've seen many things go awry with my work betwixt sale and print. I've had poems with large portions inexplicably printed in italics. I've had scene breaks go missing. I've had line breaks added or removed. And, of course, more typos and typesetting errors than a fir tree could shake a branch at in the middle of a hurricane.
Never once did I assume from ANY of these things that the venue in which my work was published did not value or understand said work. Anyone who has been in this business long enough will tell you -- publishing happens.
On the contrary, THESE are the things that would make me think a market did not value or understand certain work (or the creators thereof):
1) It simply does not publish that type of work (though this likely reflects reader preference more than editorial value).
2) It consistently publishes very poor examples of said work.
3) It fails to pay contributors for said work after publishing it (assuming it's a paying market).
4) It fails to respond to submissions, and especially queries, in a timely fashion (or, you know, at all).
How about you? I'm truly curious. What would make you think a publication did not value or understand the work it publishes?
NOTE: This is not an attack on certain personalities who may have had similar discussions recently in other venues. This is simply an attempt to elicit opinions from MY readership and colleagues. So keep it civil -- overflow sniping will earn you a sharp rap on the knuckles.
Everything Else
We leave in a few minutes for Hem-Onc visit #5,436,002. Here's hoping Max will not need either a blood transfusion or a platelet transfusion, but judging from his paleness and increased bleeding tendencies, my money is on him needing both. However, this is one instance in which I'd be happy to be proven wrong. Heh.
ETA: I was wrong! No transfusions necessary! Yaay!
(But "miscomprehension" is still not a word.)
10/5/09 09:34 pm
Update
September 2009 Tally
Submissions: 5
Rejections: 2
Sales: 0
Total submissions for 2009: 34
Total rejections: 26
Total sales: 6
Ave. submissions/month for 2009: 4
Percent sales for 2009: 18%
Writing
*Submission, Stories That Lift, 10/5
Everything Else
Today is the first day of Fall Break for both EB and YB. Two and a half weeks with all three of my kids home all day. Can you feel my joy? I knew you could. Heh.
9/30/09 09:24 am
IT'S HEE-ERE!!!!!
Without further ado, I present to you:
Castles High and Fair
Please let me know what you think (first five posters win a cool prize!), bookmark it, and come back to visit often!
Special thanks to Amanda Downum of Magpie Mind for making this little dream a reality!
9/29/09 10:01 am
Writing
*Submission, Murky Depths, 9/28
*Submission, Abyss & Apex, 9/28
*Rejection, Electric Velocipede, 9/28 (RT: 2 1/2 weeks)
The website is ready, and I'll be unveiling it TOMORROW, so check back! The first five people who post their comments after it goes live will win their choice of my autographed works. (Hey, they might actually be worth something some day, so you don't want to miss out -- just in case. Heh.)
Everything Else
Through the generous donations of time, talent, and tickets, we were able to get family portraits done this weekend AND attend a Diamondbacks game. The kids had a wonderful time at both, and we are so very grateful to Hopekids and the Schommer and Nelson families for making this weekend possible. While we wouldn't have chosen this path for our family, we are so thankful for the many blessings that have been bestowed on us because of it.
9/23/09 10:11 pm
Writing
*Rejection, Shock Totem, 9/23 (RT: 1 week)
Well, as far as rejections go, it had the benefit of being quick and succinct. Heh.
And the new website is almost ready. Really, it's true. Yes, I know you've heard that one before, but it's even more true this time than it was the last time I said it. Honest!
So, make sure you stop by, say, next week(ish) for the big unveiling. It's gonna knock your socks off! (It might possibly take some skin off as well -- you've been warned! Heh.)
Everything Else
Two days of chemo down, one to go. And Max actually rolled over today, at exactly 6 months! He'd done it once or twice before, but it was before his tumor grew big enough to make rolling difficult, so this is a big milestone for him. Yaay!
Also, YB was on the news today! They had "Whirlybird Wednesday" at his school, where one of the local new stations lands their helicopter on the soccer field and the kids get to file by and take a closer look while dodging spinning blades of death. Or something like that. I'm not really sure what the purpose of it is, but the kids seem to like it.
Anyway, you can see the side of YB's head and his backpack as the camera is panning through the crowd of kids. Actually, the only reason I even know it was him is because he was standing close to his teacher and wearing a brightly-colored shirt. But, still -- his first TV appearance! Surely an Emmy can't be far behind! Heh.
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Woohoo for shrinkage!
Argh! Where are my keys????
This will be me tomorrow, heh.
Sleep...must have SLEEP...
Grrrr...
Mourning
Look! More words!
Fervent prayers ascending
Stupid people piss me off.
Me in two weeks. Heh.
Silver linings abound.
Ta-da!!!!!
Victory is mine!
Not a bad day